Okay, I don't think I'm alive anymore.

First track, 激しさと、この胸の中で絡み付いた灼熱の闇...My breathing suddenly stopped when the song started with Shinya's drums...And really intelligent move...to start with the chorus. At first I thought they turned into X Japan (or worse, Mana). But after I got more into the song, I discovered some similarities between this song and the first songs they made. Like, it's a better version of them. And then it hit me: THIS IS THE NEW BEGINNING OF DIR EN GREY! Seriously explosive, this song is! I don't know how, but it gives me a feeling of unity. O.o
When it ended I could finally breath a little...and then...I froze. Zan! Heavier, but not really different from the original song. The speed, the darkness, the power and the rhythm killed me. This must be awesome live! O_O And Shinya totally beat the crap out of Yoshiki! O_O Amazing drumming!
And afterwords, I thought I was totally prepared for whatever must have been coming. But I was wrong... Shokubeni started as dark as always, but I felt as its power was strangely amplified. Kyo's voice felt like piercing through my mind, even if sometimes felt without much power left. However, the part where Kyo was singing alone took my breath away, made my heart race and I froze.
I can't believe I'm alive after hearing such a single...
Dir en grey will never disappoint me!
And I think I saw on youtube a comment like this "to be a 'real' fan you don't have to like everything they release.". I respect his/her opinion, but seriously: there's no such thing as a 'real fan'. There are just 'fans'. Fans are supposed to support the artists' creations, of course, if they like it. You are a fan of a certain creation(s)...But that's different from being a fan of the artist, right? O_O

I somehow managed to make a blog. Even if I don't know much about blogs or websites, I managed to make it... Okay, I actually managed to copy-paste some things >.>
Link: http://sleepdisease.blogspot.com/
I'll post all my works there...

......
And now switching to more serious talk:

It's winter! ^-^
>.> I both love and hate winter. >.> But this month has a really nice start. Why? Well, today, "Hageshisa to, Kono Mune no Naka de Karamitsuita Shakunetsu no Yami" (激しさと、この胸の中で絡み付いた灼熱の闇)-copy-pasted -_-" - is being released. And it seems like Wikipedia already labeled it as metalcore. >.>
I'm going to listen to it now, and then post a short review (two words) about it. ^-^

I bought oranges....and their scent invaded my house... I was listening, again, to "Uroboros" and strangely, the combination between the album and oranges was perfect, relaxing... It reminded me of winter and Christmas. The scent of oranges always reminds me of Dir en grey. I don't really know why...
When I was just starting to like Dir en grey's music it was summer. The heat, the sweat, the energy, everything was perfect. But I suppose Diru's music suits winter the best. Now, I remember I was listening to "Ain't afraid to die" a lot in winter, when everything was covered in the scent of oranges. I had started to like the remix album "Kai" around that time too. The darkness, the energy, the violence, the calmness of Dir en grey's music suits winter the best. Or so I feel...

I listened again to “Uroboros”, from the beginning till the end. After the last track ended, I strangely felt like the aroma of life invading the room and suffocating me. I, again, could feel like I am certainly alive. I strangely felt really calm, relaxed and like everything is just beginning. This album gave me time to look at my life, take a picture and frame it. It made me remember why I chose to walk the path I am currently walking. Indeed, "Uroboros" is an album which you might look at with indifference at first, but after listening to it more and more, it grows on you, and the aftertaste seems to become much more powerful with every play too. It definitely is an album which I'll always be happy to listen even after a year, two years, or who knows, maybe even after ten years.
I had some inspiration lately and I was in the mood for song composing, but what shocked me was when a friend told me "This sounds like that song" after he heard what I've composed. I didn't even know who that band was. I decided to look at this experience in more than one way:
1. I've been proved that I got a little bit better at song composing.
2. I have to be more inventive and let my imagination flow.
3. To create something you need to destroy everything that has been made.

Pic from "Trans" photo album...

             

I know I'm late, but I finally heard "Praparat" from Chemical Pictures. They left me without words....
                At first, I couldn't decide whether  to put them on this place or not cause of Girugamesh's single "Crying Rain" which I considered the best single released this month....but here I am saying that "Praparat" is the best thing I've heard till now....Why? The guitar riffs blew my mind.
                 But that doesn't mean it's better than "Crying Rain". They both something I have to get used to, and that is: 
                       1. "Crying Rain" "rap" parts...I don't know if you could name them this, but....
                       2. Tenten's voice - this is something you need to accept.  When I first heard MUCC, I was in the same situation, but I grew to like Tatsurou's voice and I don't particularly dislike Tenten's voice. I consider it unique, but I suppose you'd have a hard time controlling this voice so that it sounds really good. 
                  It was raining when I first heard "Crying Rain" so it really got into my heart. The atmosphere was the same and it really calmed me down. So that's why they were immediately number one. But "Praparat" really made my day. "Reincarnation" has that relaxing spring-summer feeling, and now when the sun is finally coming out of the clouds, that song is the best choice. 
                  So I suppose they're both really good for this month @_@. Musically, Girugamesh and Chemical Pictures can't be compared....they're from different styles so I advise you to stop comparing bands from totally different styles. @_@ *you know who I'm talking about* . I hope Chemical Pictures will keep up the good work, cause they're pretty unique and interesting. ^-^
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      But of course, these two aren't the only ones that released new singles this month. I had to write about them one day....

         Firstly, Gazette- Before I decay
         I shall comment on the PV first.....
        Kai.......Kai is awesome. I like his hair! ^-^ And he seems so serious now....and mad....and evil @_@ I like it... I always thought Kai's actually evil behind those smiles of his...O.O
        Reita.....I think he lost weight -_-...but there's not much of a difference @_@
        Uruha.... I shall mention I didn't give any attention to Uruha so I had to watch again the PV....and I see no particular change....maybe weight @_@
       Aoi..... He was really energetic @_@...He's skinny but looks good O.O...And I like his moves...I think...O.O
       Ruki.....oh yeah...the mighty hamster ^-^....joking... I HATE his costume -_-. He's SKINNY....But it's Ruki so who cares...
    
             Now, the SONG! *muahahahaha*. Starts good, kind of indie though....especially the drums. But maybe they're trying to modify their style O.o. Who knows?!  I suppose Ruki sings in English, ‘cause I don't understand a word....His singing is good at least. My favorite part is from 2:13 till 3:00. Really, it's the best part.... Well...it has a catchy chorus...it's a catchy song....and that's it. It's not exceptionally good, but not bad either. Let's see what's next O.o

          

SuG- Life 2Die
           Ummm...they...changed?! O_O
           I shall not comment on the PV ....
           Takeru's voice, same as Tenten's, is pretty hard to control to sound really good...I guess...But strangely it sounds really good in this song. The instrumental also has changed a little. I noticed they included some beat boxing too. It's a catchy, hyper SHORT song. It's a little too short?! I really like how it starts...The guitar lines seem to have improved a little, which is good.....The solo is good too, it matches the song. 
            As for "P!NK MASQUERADE"...ahem...I shall wait for the full version, but I have a bad feeling about it.

 

       

 

Screw- Genei no kusari
       I don't listen that much to Screw but I wanted to check them out as they released this new PV...
       I can finally see a really good PV. Except the hanging microphone....why was that thing there anyway? I can't say much about it....just that it's awesome
       The song....All in all it's good...Pretty sad and mysterious. The guitar solo was awesome. Byou's voice was unexpectedly good....like a cross between Ruki-Gackt-Asagi O_O....but I hope he'll develop more originally from now on...
      The instrumental was good....kind of indie...-_-
But....there's a but...the songs on the new album sound the same...kind of repeatedly

       Kagrra- Shiki
       I don't really listen to Kagrra but I was informed they released a new single. It's a nice song but not impressing.

  
     
           I suppose out of all PsC new singles, Alice Nine "Hana" with the PV for "Sleepwalker" were the best.  

      And so I gotta leave....but before that : I hope Miyavi gets better! And his injury isn't really that bad.....=_=  Strangely I felt like listening to Miyavi today, and then visited his myspace...and what do I see? BAD NEWS....

        Bye Bye stalker...  

 

 

 

 

 

                 

Seems like i got better at singing...so next month will involve these songs:

                         1. Korn- Twist (I still can't do it)
                         2. Queen Adreena- My silent undoing, Join the dots (cause I love these songs)
                         3. Monoral- Like you, Visions in my head, Pocketful of joy, Let me in, Tame me, Widow's tool, Kiri, Tuesday, Casbah, Via (I'm in love with this band)
                        4.MUCC- Utagoe, Libra, Saishuu Ressha, Tonbi, Kokoro no nai machi, Ageha, Sora to ito, Hanabi,Gerbera; covers: Tsubasa wo kudasai, Wine Red no kokoro, Shiki no uta, Niwaka ame session, Kasa ga nai, Nagoriyuki
                        5.Olivia Lufkin- Wish, Starless night, Shadow of love, Rock you, Winter Sleep, Spider Spins
                        6.Yuko Ando- Ame Tsuki, Dramatic Record
                        7.Girugamesh- Crying Rain, S.T.F.U.
                        8. Marilyn Manson- I want to kill you like they do in the movies, 15
                       9. Lynch- Adore, Ambivalent Ideal
                     10. Dir en grey- Bottom of the death valley, Ugly, Conceived Sorrow, Agitated Screams of Maggots, Ryoujoku no ame, Disabled Complexes, Clever Sleazoid, Toguro, Glass Skin, Inconvenient Ideal, Obscure,Audience Killer Loop, Kasumi, R to the Core, Drain Away, Mercilless Cult,°C, Dead Tree, The Final, Higeki wa Mabuta Wo Oroshita Yasashiki Utsu, Kodou
                       11. Hyde- The cape of storms, Oasis, Shallow Sleep, Angel's Tale, Secret Letters, Made in Heaven, Countdown, Sweet Vanilla, Midnight Celebration
                       12. Nirvana- Smells like teen Spirit, Come as you are
                      

                     Okay...maybe they're for two months...*74 songs* xD...maybe three months O_O

 

                  

  My homework for the day after tomorrow is to compose the description of the "nearsighted adolescent" in relation with our favorite chapter from the first volume.  Personally, having no favorite chapter, I chose one of the short chapters that had at least a phrase in common with my beliefs, and that is "7th CH. The way to myself" ("VII.Drumul catre mine insumi"). But it's a little bit hard as I tend to analyze words and phrases too much. And I know the book's written in a style that allows the writer to express his feelings directly, clearly, better. Not too much analysis to make, just simple conclusions. But isn't that a little boring? XD
                        The chapter starts with "I have to know myself. I have to finally know for sure who I am and what do I want." *crappy translation* Afterwards, he basically says he had always postponed this process/action of knowing one's self because of his fear of finding out something that would depress him or disappoint him. Questioning his being, his character, he's also asking himself if the way he is, isn’t just a fake created by himself; if he didn't somehow make himself carry characteristics he thought he required.
                        He realizes that every time he wanted to analyze his own soul, he woke up in pitch darkness, not knowing where the start line is, or which soul is his real self between all those he wore.
                       After a lot of thinking, he found out one thing, which it seems he already suspected: "the "me" right now, is different from the "me" from last hour, or the "me" from yesterday." And the conclusion he hit was that "Personality is just something imposed by will, and not something with the source in the depth of the soul; just a mask".
                       Revealing his adolescent-type of thinking/ working, he denies his last conclusion, because he knows "there's only one soul, but different attitudes”. Even though he, now, knows he has only one soul, his search of self is even more difficult. He even dares to say calculus is much easier (considering that he had known almost nothing in Mathematics), or at least he'd know where to start from. 
                       What he really wants to know about his soul is if it’s the soul of a melancholic adolescent or of a fierce male, if he's a scientist or a sentimentalist, if he can trust his current activities or he has to suspect them and make early changes.   
                      Scared of the future in which he finds himself excluded from the friendly world he is a member of now, of the thoughts of making a mistake every time, reviewing his moments in his attic, between books, loneliness and the smell of rain and fall, realizes that when he lights up the lamp and the attic comes back to life and his soul revives, he slowly regrets all the minutes spent on looking out on the window.
                     In the end of the chapter, he voices out his desire of finding out who he is and reveals that all the Journals he kept were for discovering that.  Looking at himself, he can only see foreign features, contradictions. Not knowing any of his characters for the novel, or anyone similar, he'll never be able to write "The novel of the nearsighted adolescent". 

   So what am I supposed to say from all this crap? -_-
   His feelings are quite obvious....I hate descriptions -_-

                          Leaving all this crap aside, it's already late....and tomorrow....no, today is important for this shitty country, politically at least. Personally, I don't give a damn about it.  I'll still wake up tomorrow....and look at the cute picture of Hizumi set as wallpaper on my phone and then....make a BIG WTF face XD.   
                            This is all today....all of a sudden...it's just random talk...
 

                  I'm back with layout talk. I changed my layout with the new month coming. I wanted one related to all the things happening this month, but I couldn't resist the Diru layout, so I chose this instead. Credit, like last time, goes to valuexofxpain
                   Thank you for all your hard work!


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    I also made an Ameba blog lately. I hope I'll learn soon all the things related to it and how to make it more interesting. xD
     Link: ameblo.jp/section-zero/
   .......................................................................................
   That's it for now I guess.....gotta come back later ^-^. *especially with "Crying rain" being released*

            

Yep....I'm back again...
               Boredom makes me write stupid things.... Well,,,,what's up with me lately? I'm saving up for equipment....I wanna buy lots of things for my guitar, and I just got the motivation to do so. I just need to save up all my money and maybe someday, I'll be able to obtain those things. And I want to transform my house into a studio, but thinking of all the things I'll have to move when I'll leave my parent's house.....-_-"
               For now, I want to buy a new guitar, a bass(plus bass amp), effects, microphones and lots of other things. There are some things I can get easily...like, in a few months...but the guitar, for example....maybe next year xD
              This month I'll have to buy new headphones and they're fucking expensive.*double my allowance*
              Good news could be: I made a step in getting into a band. But seriously I feel like going to a job interview. Well, the only experienced member is a guitarist-vocalist guy. They have a possible second guitarist and a drummer, but they don't have their instruments yet. And they seem to have a bassist too. Now, where would I fit in? Vocals. If I beat the guitarist-vocalist guy and prove that I have a better voice, or I suit them better, then I'll be their vocalist. 
                 The bad thing about it is that I'm not confident in my ability to sing, plus they might like a male vocalist better than a female one. *I can be sure of that already*. Plus, it seems the guy's best ability is to scream. I'm like...damned.
                 The good thing is that I have time till April to improve my vocals. Why's that? Cause around that time, the drummer is going to get his drums. >.>
                 Sincerely speaking, I like the idea of being the guitarist more, but it seams my rival is better on guitar and he is a composer too. He already made a song....a chill-out song. I'm not sure how a male vocalist with screaming as a specialty will be able to sing a relaxing song... but I can't say I'm any better. 
                My vocal training starts from Monday and I made a list of songs to cover:
 
             -Korn-Twist
         I actually don't really like Korn. But I have a friend that told me this song is extremely hard to sing. And I like challenges.

             -Dir en Grey-Obscure
          Actually, this song isn't that hard to sing anymore, but I didn't master it yet. Plus, I didn't sing it for a while....

             -Dir en grey-Embryo
          First song I've loved from them. And believe it or not, it's pretty hard to sing.

             -Monoral- Like you
          I just like this song a lot. And I remember singing it once. Of course I sucked big time. That's why I'm gonna try it once more.

             -Marilyn Manson- Sweet Dreams, Disposable Teens
            Even though I don't give a fuck about Marilyn Manson, I'm pretty interested in the way he screams. Plus, his songs/covers seem to not put any borders on your vocals....like you can sing them any way you want.

             -Queen Adreena- Pretty like drugs, My silent undoing, Taxidermy,
           Another one that puts no borders to your voice. Just go insane and sing it the way you want.

             -Nirvana-Smells like teen spirit, Come as you are
           The band I've liked since I was really little.
 
             -Sex Pistols- God save the queen
           I don't think you can call it singing....but...whatever...I just like the song...I always liked this song...


        This is all for a month...I'll think of others for the next month. I wanna cover all the genres. And I WILL succeed. No matter what....

    .................................................................

        

Speaking of Dir en grey, I realized I started listening to them when they still were in the "VK scene". But looking back, I really didn't see any change in them. Like Withering to death-Marrow of a bone... I really didn't give a damn fuck about the fact that they went metal, or how so many old fans are saying, "Americanized" and I still don't.  "The Marrow of a bone" really felt like a challenge for me. Like, "let's see if you can accept me for what I am". And I fell in love with the album from the day it was released. And it's not "Conceived sorrow" or the other ballads on this album that I listen to the most. It's true that my love for "the marrow of a bone" grew this year because of the so many lives of "Repetition of Hatred". In "Uroboros" case, I listened to it in the first month like crazy, not so much right now. I got tired of songs like "Toguro", "Glass Skin" and "Dozing Green", but I like "Stuck Man" and "Vinushka". As for the other albums, I only listen to a few songs now and then, mostly Six Ugly-Vulgar. I didn't listen at all this past half a year to "Withering to Death" which really surprises me now.
            Maybe they changed, but to me, with every album they become another band. But I like all the Dir en grey, because together they make the 11 years old Dir en Grey.  For example, if I take the Kyo from "Vulgar" and then listen to Kyo from "Uroboros", they're like totally different persons. And I'm not talking only about his voice, or looks. The feelings, emotions he puts in the songs are different,maybe they're even stronger then before, maybe they're harder to take on.They did change a lot, but these changes don't affect the way I'm looking at their music, or my opinion about them. I also don't think they got "Americanized". Maybe they are influenced, more or less, but they choose what music to make. If they feel like playing metal, they should. If they feel like experimenting with new types of sounds, they should. It's their way of expressing themselves, that something they made is their feelings, their emotions; if you don't like them, you can as well not listen to them, and maybe come back after a year to see if something changed, which I assure you, it did.
             And I don't even know why I'm writing this. Maybe I'm lying and the way I'm looking at them now is different from 4 years ago. Maybe I did change with them and adapted, and maybe that's why I like their music even now. I respect them and their work and I like every album, even "Uroboros". *the live for "Toguro" is amazing.*
             And all these years I learned to be a blank page every time I'm looking at a newly discovered band, or when listening to a new album. So that I won't compare anyone and decide upon what's good, what's bad, and who's on the waiting list. This reminds me that I should make a list with all the bands that I expect something good from, and another one for those who are already good to be eaten. Like an "indie"-"major" thing.
              When I'll finish it, I'll post it. I think this is all I wanted to say....
              Good night or Good morning,whichever, I'll be back!